I'm not really sure who named our city, but it fits. Eden Prairie truly is a beautiful place. Rolling hills, verdant dells and valleys, ponds, streams, lakes. Lovely. Especially now. This is my favorite time of year in Minnesota. There's an old joke that says Minnesota has two seasons: 10 months of Winter and 2 months of Misquito. However, a well-kept secret is that Minnesota is a mild, comfortable place to live from mid April until about late October. The spring is in the 60s and 70s with low humidity, the summer days rarely exceed 90, and the fall....Well, the fall... it's gorgeous. Even the first snow, leading up to and through the major holidays, is a wonderful time.
That's why it's been such a joy to bring Cory home to Minnesota when we have. Arriving in mid August allowed him a couple weeks at our local pool enjoying summer days, and now, with school a week off, you can catch a slight hint of fall in the morning air. Not cold, just a little cooler than what July and August mornings bring.
And he is loving it all.
With all that's been going on in our home, it's been a huge relief and joy to see Cory acclimating so well to his new environment and home. As many of you may not know, recently Suzanne was diagnosed with breast cancer. Thankfully, it has not metastisized beyond the breast and the two nodes directly next to it, and the prognosis is good (i.e. only a 15% chance of recurrence within three years). However, she started chemo and will follow that with surgery right after the New Year. Yes, a lot is going on in the Duncan home.
It would be impossible for me to relay even the major news in the confines of this blog, but I'll try to hit the key points.
Cory is such an energetic, naturally passionate and joyful boy--he has been a real light of wonder and happiness to us in just the short 2.5 weeks we have had him home in the states. Other than an occasional crying episode (once a day at the most), he is getting along smashingly with his siblings and with the neighborhood kids. And most of the time, when he does get upset, it's because of a language breakdown or misunderstanding. Even there, he is learning English at a very rapid pace. When I took him to the medical clinic in Kiev, the doctor could only get him to count to four in Russian. Two days ago, he walked up to me and counted to 10 in English, unprompted! Wow, flash cards really do work, folks. Our family is a walking testimony to the usefulness of picture books, flash cards, and a lot of repetition and explanataion of things in the house, at the store, in the yard. Etc.
Yesterday I took him to Hannah's junior high school open house and he had his first glimpse of a drinking fountain. What an amazing invention! He just could not stop oohing and ahhing over this beautiful little machine that dispenses crisp, clean water--whenever you like! Thankfully, the junior high halls only had four drinking fountains, otherwise we would have been shutting the place down along with the night janitor.
Kylie and Hannah have had a lot of fun "showing Cory off" to the neighborhood kids--and I mean a lot of kids. On our street and the street next to us, we have around 20 kids ages 10 and under. You walk outside and it looks like a summer camp, with kids running everywhere, kicking balls, riding bikes, etc. For the first few days upon arriving in the states, Cory was just completely overwhelmed by it all, and ran from one bike to the next, from one ball to the next. i just think his circuits were blown. He particularly took a liking to anything to do with trucks or motorcycles, and got a hold of a neighbors toy "monster truck" that makes a loud revving noise and plays Queen's "We Will Rock You" at one volume level--loud. Fun for him, but after about two hours of him pushing the button, I'm ready to tell Freddy Mercury (God rest his soul) and the Boys to take a break. (I actually had to wait til he fell asleep to return the truck, otherwise he would have wrestled me for it.)
Overall, I think all three girls are adjusting well. Naturally, Zoe and Cory, being the same size and closest in age, do tend to bicker on occasion. So far, though, we've only had to referee a couple of arguments over toys and food, and we've had no major hitting or kicking conflagrations. I've been spending a lot of time just hanging out with Zoe, and I think she is making the adjustment. Last night she told me she loved having a big brother and that he is "a lot of fun to play with--most of the time."
With Suz going through chemo, a new adopted boy in the house, and the girls (and Cory) getting ready for school, you could say that we've all been a bit overwhelmed. Thankfully, our families have really stepped up to the plate, and for the past three weeks, we've had a relative with us helping out with the kids, meals, etc. My sisters even made a public calendar where folks in our families can go to sign up to come stay with us. Right now, we will have a "family helper" staying with us almost continuously through early November. A HUGE relief and help. Also, one of my best friends has set up a meals calendar for local folks to cook and deliver meals, which is both humbling and wonderful. And for those who live long-distance, he had the excellent idea of having people send certificates for us to pick up food at a place called Let's Dish (you can pick up a week's worth of meals in just 15 minutes).
Even though it's a difficult time for us as a family, the "adoption part" of our lives is going better than what expected. It will be very interesting to see how Cory takes to kindergarten, which he will begin a week from today. The great news is that there is a Russian community in our town, and consequently his elementary school employs a Russian-language ESL teacher. So, even though he's going "full immersion" with English, he will be working with the ESL teacher as well.
Okay - sorry if this post is sort of "all over the map" - I am just grabbing time when I can get my hands on it. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers. We appreciate them very much!
The Duncans
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
Home again
We made it home. What a journey, from start to finish. I believe the last time I posted was a week and a half ago, when I had about four days left in the waiting period. A world and eternity seems like it's passed since then. Where to begin?
On the final day of the waiting period Igor and I went clothes shopping for Jenya, as we knew that when we picked him up at the orphange he would not even own the clothes on his back. So, a cabbie steered us to an excellence little children's clothing store. What an experience shopping for a
boy. At that point, since Jenya wasn't with us, I had to use a tape measure that I'd marked the day before with his dimensions: foot, waist, inseam, etc. That was an interesting experience, but in the end, we were able to get him about 2.5 full sets of clothes.
Off to the orphanage we went. And sure enough, when we arrived for the big occassion of taking him away, he was wearing the sandles I'd bought him a few days before, and some underwear. Seeing him there, waiting to see the clothes I'd bought for him, reminded me of the value of human life in God's eyes. Here's this little guy who literally did not own the clothes on his back (when I dressed him in his new underwear and clothes, the old underwear stayed behind at the orphanage), standing before us just the way the good Lord made him. Literally owning nothing in the world. Not a toy, a shirt, or a pair of pants. Nothing. Yet, here my family and I had travelled half way round the world, spent tens of thousands of dollars, and more than a month of time away from home and hearth, to find, adopt, and bring into our family this little 40-pound, 6-year-old guy who, back to back, is just an inch taller than my 4 year old daughter. But it's not the money, time or travel that marks his worth. His is a value beyond human estimation or demarcation. Naked we enter this world, and naked we leave it. The value comes with us as we enter, and leaves as we depart--everything inanimate accumulated in the middle means nothing really.
Once Cory joined me, things moved very fast--suffice to say we had about four whirlwind days, starting in Mariupol with a two-hour plane flight on a 50s-era Soviet double-prop plane (and I do mean plane, not jet). It was Cory's first flight--which he'll probably never forget because he threw up three times. Did I mention we only had 2.5 sets of clothes? Did I also mention the fact that the cabin was not equipped with any airsick bags? That's right, do the math....
After that inauspicious introduction to the world of commercial flight, Cory and I arrived in Kiev and hit the ground running, to and from the U.S. embassy to secure his final travel visa to the States. During those few days, Cory had his first experience with an elevator, escalator, washing machine (he sat in front of the washing machine in the apartment where we were staying and used my flashlight to watch the wash go round and round. He sat through three loads like that!) It was amazing to witness those--and other--such experiences with my new son. Finally, on Saturday last (the 11th) we boarded our KLM flight from Kiev to Amsterdam, with a two-hour layover before our Northwest flight to Minneapolis.
One problem: They "postponed" our AMS-MSP flight for 16 hours for "technical difficulties" (read: pilot decides not to show up), which meant we'd have to either find another way to get to the States, or spend the night in Amsterdam. I'll skip the part where I basically blew up at the KLM official who wouldn't give us boarding passes on a 3/4-full flight to Boston--because he said we didn't have a reservation. (I think I actually used the word "heartless" when I was arguing with him.) We had boarding passes for a delayed flight, but he basically refused to acknowledge that little fact. Okay, so I didn't skp this part. It's good you weren't there (whoever you are) as I would have embarrassed you. I was "that guy" at the gate who basically makes a scene. In any event, we ended up spending a cozy night at a very new, very nice Holiday Inn near the AMS airport.
Sunday we headed out early to the airport to make sure we made it through customs without a hitch. On the plane we go, me completely exhuasted and Cory excited and nervous to be heading to America. I said to myself as I walked down the aisle to our seats in 24A and 24B, This will be nice as Cory can color, play with his toys, and watch 2-3 kids movies on the on-demand video system. So we sit down and a lovely voice comes over the intercom: "Due to technical difficulties, the video system is out of service for our 9.5-hour flight to Minneapolis today...." That's pretty much all I heard, even though she chattered on for a few more minutes about the duty free options, I think. More "technical difficulties"? Did the pilot who failed to show up the day before also decide to sabotage the video system? I know, it sounds so whiny , to get that panicked about no videos for 9.5 hours. But I tell you what, when you are flying internationally with a 6-year-old with the energy of Kathy Lee (is her name still Gifford?) and the stamina of Lance Armstrong, you'll take every diversion you can get. In the end, even though the video system was kaput, Cory and I managed to have a fairly nice, uneventful flight home.
That's when the real excitement started, but I'll save that for my next post....
Off to the orphanage we went. And sure enough, when we arrived for the big occassion of taking him away, he was wearing the sandles I'd bought him a few days before, and some underwear. Seeing him there, waiting to see the clothes I'd bought for him, reminded me of the value of human life in God's eyes. Here's this little guy who literally did not own the clothes on his back (when I dressed him in his new underwear and clothes, the old underwear stayed behind at the orphanage), standing before us just the way the good Lord made him. Literally owning nothing in the world. Not a toy, a shirt, or a pair of pants. Nothing. Yet, here my family and I had travelled half way round the world, spent tens of thousands of dollars, and more than a month of time away from home and hearth, to find, adopt, and bring into our family this little 40-pound, 6-year-old guy who, back to back, is just an inch taller than my 4 year old daughter. But it's not the money, time or travel that marks his worth. His is a value beyond human estimation or demarcation. Naked we enter this world, and naked we leave it. The value comes with us as we enter, and leaves as we depart--everything inanimate accumulated in the middle means nothing really.
Once Cory joined me, things moved very fast--suffice to say we had about four whirlwind days, starting in Mariupol with a two-hour plane flight on a 50s-era Soviet double-prop plane (and I do mean plane, not jet). It was Cory's first flight--which he'll probably never forget because he threw up three times. Did I mention we only had 2.5 sets of clothes? Did I also mention the fact that the cabin was not equipped with any airsick bags? That's right, do the math....
After that inauspicious introduction to the world of commercial flight, Cory and I arrived in Kiev and hit the ground running, to and from the U.S. embassy to secure his final travel visa to the States. During those few days, Cory had his first experience with an elevator, escalator, washing machine (he sat in front of the washing machine in the apartment where we were staying and used my flashlight to watch the wash go round and round. He sat through three loads like that!) It was amazing to witness those--and other--such experiences with my new son. Finally, on Saturday last (the 11th) we boarded our KLM flight from Kiev to Amsterdam, with a two-hour layover before our Northwest flight to Minneapolis.
One problem: They "postponed" our AMS-MSP flight for 16 hours for "technical difficulties" (read: pilot decides not to show up), which meant we'd have to either find another way to get to the States, or spend the night in Amsterdam. I'll skip the part where I basically blew up at the KLM official who wouldn't give us boarding passes on a 3/4-full flight to Boston--because he said we didn't have a reservation. (I think I actually used the word "heartless" when I was arguing with him.) We had boarding passes for a delayed flight, but he basically refused to acknowledge that little fact. Okay, so I didn't skp this part. It's good you weren't there (whoever you are) as I would have embarrassed you. I was "that guy" at the gate who basically makes a scene. In any event, we ended up spending a cozy night at a very new, very nice Holiday Inn near the AMS airport.
Sunday we headed out early to the airport to make sure we made it through customs without a hitch. On the plane we go, me completely exhuasted and Cory excited and nervous to be heading to America. I said to myself as I walked down the aisle to our seats in 24A and 24B, This will be nice as Cory can color, play with his toys, and watch 2-3 kids movies on the on-demand video system. So we sit down and a lovely voice comes over the intercom: "Due to technical difficulties, the video system is out of service for our 9.5-hour flight to Minneapolis today...." That's pretty much all I heard, even though she chattered on for a few more minutes about the duty free options, I think. More "technical difficulties"? Did the pilot who failed to show up the day before also decide to sabotage the video system? I know, it sounds so whiny , to get that panicked about no videos for 9.5 hours. But I tell you what, when you are flying internationally with a 6-year-old with the energy of Kathy Lee (is her name still Gifford?) and the stamina of Lance Armstrong, you'll take every diversion you can get. In the end, even though the video system was kaput, Cory and I managed to have a fairly nice, uneventful flight home.
That's when the real excitement started, but I'll save that for my next post....
Some boys during play time at orphanage
Friday, August 3, 2007
Waiting
I'm down to four days until the 10-day waiting period finishes. It looks like I will be able to pick up Cory from the orphanage next Tuesday morning, August 7, and hopefully be back in Kiev by the eve of August 8, with last paperwork items to do there, finishing by Friday eve. We have our flights booked for Saturday morning, August 11, departing Kiev at 1150am. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we have very little room for error in gathering the proper paperwork starting Tuesday. If we can't get things done at the U.S. embassy by Friday afternoon, it means waiting another "working day" and having to move the flight back to Tuesday August 14.
Cory is doing great, and is learning some English words. He really likes grabbing leaves off the trees when I give him piggy back rides, so that was the first word he learned: LEAF! He's a sharp little guy. I missed visiting on Wednesday and when I showed up on Thursday he literally sprinted from about 30 yards away and jumped into my arms saying Papa, Papa, over and over. The English-speaking helper told me that he thought I wasn't going to adopt him, and he was scared. I was able to have a pretty cool moment with him with the lady translating, and told him I was his Papa, that I would always be his Dad, and he wouldn't have to worry about not having a Mom and Dad. The orphanage worker got teary. It was a great moment. he said to me through the translator, "Papa, you have a beautiful heart." Wow.
Hope to post again this weekend.
Thanks!
Kyle
Thursday, August 2, 2007
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